Oh the loveliness of the double chin...when it's Katie and her friend Jasmine....its hilarious. They contort their necks and face to make as many double chins as they can. Who does that????? I'll tell you who....thin, cute little girls. Laugh at double chins when you are a teen being funny...but when you are an adult...and you don't have to work at the double chin...not so funny.
This last week Ned and I went to Lincoln City for his birthday for a couple nights. We gambled, Ned photographed, we shopped, hot tubbed, and played in the pool. We had a wonderful time. Ned is always so sweet and loving and he thought that I looked extra pretty one of the days and he wanted to take my picture. We pulled off into Fogarty Creek Park...found the perfect place with some lovely greenery behind me...Ned looked through the lens and told me how pretty I was...he pushed the button...and the shutter did it's thing...and I asked to see the digital image so I would know if there was a hair out of place or my collar was wrong. What happened next...Ned nor I was really prepared for. He turned the camera around...and the picture I saw was not me...not how I see ME...maybe not how Ned sees me...but there I was with a double chin and a round face that I could not hide...and I BURST into tears. :( I refused to take any more pictures and I walked to the car. Ned erased the files...and we drove off in silence. He gave some time to pull it together...and then asked what he could do...should he be quiet...should he try to figure out my crazy thoughts?lol. (I added the crazy) He thinks I'm pretty...no matter how I look...no matter how many chins I have...no matter what size. That is something I have never had. There has never been a man in my life that thinks I'm beautiful no matter what...Never...Ned..you are the first...and I love you even more for your honest lovely sweet wonderful thoughts.
Having said that...it is amazing how I see myself different in my head versus the mirror. In my weight loss journey...regardless of going up or down in weight my mind sees myself the same way at all times. I don't know what this all means. I do know that I can gain weight like nobody's business and be in denial about it for some time. I know that right now...I feel uncomfortable...and I've gotten a huge wake up call from the tears at Fogarty Park. Now the question is ...can I get going again? I get so tired of hearing myself talk about starting again...just get it done already NICOLE!!! It's funny how you can be your own best cheerleader and at the same time be your biggest meanest critic too.
Here we go again!
Good luck to me...maybe someday...the double chin will be funny...instead of tearful.
